Limbo

Jack be nimble Jack be quick, Jack go under limbo stick

I’m feeling like I’m in limbo right now (are we all not feeling like we’re in limbo?). Halfway between calm and chaos, wondering when (if) this pandemic will come to us (I suppose the people in Italy aren’t so much wondering). Wondering how fast it will come, how intensely, and how long it will hang around for. This little virus. A little microscopic sun.

I wonder about plans. About thru-hiking the CDT, if we’re being specific. Will it still be possible this year? The conditions in the natural world…the conditions on trail are perfect. Low snow year, cruisin’. But the conditions in the natural world are also very imperfect, with thru-hikers being an ideal vector to drag COVID-19 into isolated, vulnerable trail communities.

The binary that’s being presented is Thru-Hike This Year = You’re a Jerk/Douche/Jackass, Cancel Your Hike = You’re a Savior/Role Model/Saint.

There are truths in both of those, but does it have to be black and white? Is there room for some gray? is there a way to thru-hike this year and be respectful and minimize contact with trail communities? Is there a way to do without the attitude of ‘Nobody’s gonna stop me and nothings gonna take me off trail?’ Is there a way to do it that DOES serve the greater circle? And to continue to be humble and transparent? To get off trail when it becomes evident that it’s NOT possible to thru-hike in a way that protects trail communities? And to avoid gloating if it becomes evident that it IS possible? To keep ‘I told you so’ out of the equation altogether?

I’m still sitting with these questions. Yes, partly because I’m not ready to call off my hike. With how fast things are changing, April 17 seems like an eternity from now. And if the virus has run its course and we’re coming out of this madness, a huge support we can bring to trail communities is to spend our money there. To walk through and spend our money there and support small business that are being impacted by the now-recession.

I’m sitting with these ideas, questions, worries. I imagine all my brothers and sisters in the trail community, and in the greater community of humans who have hopes and dreams and plans. All sitting together in our respective shelters, wondering what’s going to happen. Bent halfway between the ground and the limbo stick, seeing if we’ll be able to slide through this round.